Self Sabotage
So recently I have been watching what I eat and the things that I find acceptable to eat, and how those things have changed throughout the years. When i was my thinnest I would have never eaten more than a kids meal at any fast food place and now I find myself eating whole value meals. I would only eat half size sandwiches and now I can finish one off and think about another one. And I used to live on frozen dinners but now I won’t touch them.
I need to stay more focused on what goes into my body especially when I am eating away from home, at home I am pretty good. But away from home I tend to loose control. I need to focus on eating the BEST possible option when not eating at home and stick to it.
Often we think of eating out as a special occasion when in our society it really happens all to often to be considered a special occasion. It really doesn’t deserve a splurge and I need to remember if I don’t splurge I will be way more happy with the outcome than if I do.
I always find myself wanting and dreaming about some easy fix for my weight issue. I used to dream about getting pregnant and having morning sickness so bad I would loose weight, and then being able to tightly control my diet from there and end up looking better than before after baby (yes I know to dream about morning sickness is sick). I would also dream about breastfeeding just stripping the pounds off my body like some kind of special fat melter, but I haven’t found this to be true either. In fact right now in life I have a hard time finding anything that makes the scale move in the right direction. And yes I was also having this problem before the baby. So what is it, am I really not being up front with myself? Why do I find it so hard to handle one week of eating on count? Why do I sabotage myself?
